Episodes

Day 176: This Is Not The Outcome We Wanted [Kristen Vengler]
Dec. 30, 2021

Day 176: This Is Not The Outcome We Wanted [Kristen Vengler]

Kristen goes into the operating room hopeful that this milestone is the end of her cancer, but wakes up ten hours later realizing the number of drains in her chest means the worst possible outcome. The next morning she learns that 11 lymph nodes were...
Day 160: What Snacks Do You Bring to a Double Mastectomy? [Kristen Vengler]
Dec. 16, 2021

Day 160: What Snacks Do You Bring to a Double Mastectomy? [Kristen Vengler]

How do you prepare to have a part of your body removed forever? What snacks do you bring to a double mastectomy? For Kristen, the list starts with a good pillowcase, her Anna Ono robe, her softest Kyte Baby jammies, slippers, her YETI cup, and shirts...
Day 151: How I Got Mentally Ready For A Double Mastectomy [Kristen Vengler]
Dec. 2, 2021

Day 151: How I Got Mentally Ready For A Double Mastectomy [Kristen Vengler]

Kristen readies herself for the impending double mastectomy and reflects on her original thought process in which the bad old boobs are swapped for good new boobs and that’s the end. While watching Nightbirde, a young, single woman with cancer on...
Day 131: I Regret Not Noticing This Sooner [Kristen Vengler]
Nov. 12, 2021

Day 131: I Regret Not Noticing This Sooner [Kristen Vengler]

Kristen is exhausted and ready to be done with chemo. When Scripps' entire computer system goes down from a ransomware attack, her appointments come to a screeching halt. A chemotherapy session is delayed by a day, but the frustration is short-lived...
Day 77: Did the Tumor Shrink? [Kristen Vengler]
Nov. 5, 2021

Day 77: Did the Tumor Shrink? [Kristen Vengler]

After 11 long weeks of chemotherapy we’re at the clinic to see Dr. Ali, the oncologist. Kristen is hopeful because she can see her tumor and it appears on the surface like it’s getting smaller. But the only true measure of whether the tumor has grown...
Day 60: Strange Chemo Side Effects That Nobody Tells You About [Kristen Vengler]
Oct. 28, 2021

Day 60: Strange Chemo Side Effects That Nobody Tells You About [Kristen Vengler]

Kristen adjusts to Taxol, the drug used in the second phase of chemotherapy, which brings bizarre side effects requiring special booties and mittens to prevent permanent nerve damage in her hands and feet. Her beachfront living arrangement is upended,...
Day 28: This Might Be What Kills Me [Kristen Vengler]
Oct. 21, 2021

Day 28: This Might Be What Kills Me [Kristen Vengler]

4 weeks after starting chemo, the “new normal” is here. Kristen describes what it feels like to have no hair and as the physical effects of chemo present new challenges, she realizes that breast cancer could be what ends her life. Kristen’s ongoing...
Day 13: Why I Cut All My Hair Off 3 Days Before it Fell Out [Kristen Vengler]
Oct. 8, 2021

Day 13: Why I Cut All My Hair Off 3 Days Before it Fell Out [Kristen Vengler]

At the end of the day following Kristen’s 2nd chemo treatment, she recalls her dream the previous night and describes how her hair hurts. Between the first and second chemo treatments, several surprise infections appeared along with disappointment...
Day 1: How My Doctor Missed My Breast Cancer Symptoms [Kristen Vengler]
Sept. 30, 2021

Day 1: How My Doctor Missed My Breast Cancer Symptoms [Kristen Vengler]

When Kristen noticed her right nipple felt different, her first thought was "what the F is this?" Her second thought was that her life was about to change. So she did what everyone does in this situation... she jumped out of the shower, went to...